Starting New

Let a new life happen to you.
— Nayyirah Waheed

There have been many changes in the past year. 2018 was … chaotic to say the least. Filled with heart break, trauma, self expression, revelations, growing pains, meeting amazing people, new friendships, travel, exploration, self discovery, recovery, set backs, being free, and the most incredible moments of my life. I wouldn’t change anything in 2018 even if I could. 2018 gave me my life back, taught me how to fight, and showed me how beautiful life can be. I hope you all are ready for some serious vulnerability, because things are about to get raw. If you ever thought I had everything together, think again.

To recap on 2018:

  • I got out of a long term relationship

  • Survived abuse and trauma

  • Struggled with and came to terms with my issues surrounding food (still very much working on this)

  • Moved to Lebanon - revitalized my soul + learned how to live again

  • Visited my dream city, Paris

  • Saw my sister more (and loved every minute of it) and developed a relationship that will last our lifetimes

  • Renewed a relationship with my wonderful, protective, and incredibly caring brother (we’re still working on getting him to respond to my texts though <3)

  • Grew parts of myself back

  • Grew closer to those I love most, let go of bad relationships and friendships, and started learning how to love - started to understand my fears in life (my biggest fear being vulnerability and showing feelings in anyway…. hehe)

  • Worked through an extremely stressful semester and came out on top

  • Believed in myself

And here we are. Here I am. It’s 2019. We’ve successfully made it through another year, and guess what, my friends, we thrived. And things are only just beginning, and only just starting to look up.

I’ve told this to my closest friends, and I’ll share it with all of you too, 2019 is the year of facing my fears. So, since 2019 started, what have I done?

  • Expressed my feelings openly with many people (scary)

  • Came to terms with my fear of rejection - a work in progress

  • Believed in myself + went after the things I want most

  • Am moving to Amsterdam

Why am I sharing so much? Well I guess it’s because this is also the year I am honest with myself and everyone else. I’ve decided to change this blog completely - it’s now not going to be structured around what companies I can get to partner with me, consumerism, or anything like that. It’s going to showcase this insane, beautiful, chaotic life of mine, and I really hope you all enjoy it.

Cheers to being real, conquering fears, and working towards betterment.

Infinite Xs and Os.

Living my best life under the Beirut sun.

Living my best life under the Beirut sun.

Special thanks to those incredible people who have stood by me and encouraged me throughout this year. Words cannot express how much your friendship and love mean to me.